Dear Prince George,
The Burning Bush is neither burning nor a bush. In fact, it’s a lamppost outside School Library. Judy’s Passage and Nolan’s Crack aren’t euphemisms, they’re shortcuts to the English and Maths departments.
And The Bill isn’t an inventory of costs – it’s a list of students to be punished by the Deputy Headmaster who goes by the name ‘Lower Man’ and may well give you a ‘Georgic’ – writing out 500 lines of Latin hexameter.
But don’t worry too much because, when you arrive for your first day at Eton College today, along with 250 other 13-year-old boys, this most
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