My husband has never forgiven me for a mistake I made many years ago. He is verbally abusive, swears at me daily and never shows affection. I feel trapped. DEAR CAROLINE reveals why separation is the only choice

Q My husband and I are in our late 60s and have been married for more than 40 years, with two grown-up children and grandchildren. 

Many years ago, my husband discovered I’d made a serious financial mistake while trying to sort out some debts. I put things right but he has never forgiven me. It still comes up in almost every conversation and we have had separate bank accounts ever since. 

He is verbally abusive, swears at me daily and never shows affection. He refuses to discuss our problems or consider marriage guidance, even though his mother and our children have told

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