QUENTIN LETTS: French politician Jordan Bardella’s delivery was a bit Inspector Clouseau. ‘Zurry aboot my acsent,’ he told the Reform conference. A granny behind me yelled with guttural lust: ‘We love it!’

Reform’s conference day was crazy, topsy-turvy, enormous. Security bods were having kittens. Protesters were kicked out with the regularity of sheep dung being catapulted over the city walls at the siege of Megiddo. Every time hecklers started bleating, the crowd broke into a chant of ‘boring! boring! boring!’ The more the Lefties popped up, the more ‘the people’s army’ (as Reform calls its activists) honked and cheered.

The whole shebang was an hour late to start, so many members were still queuing outside Birmingham’s National Exhibition Centre. Further delay was caused by a bomb scare of some type.

Party leader Farage lost

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