Why do women wear clothes that seem designed to repulse men? These are the fashion trends, from Lady Diana blouses and barrel jeans to Big Bird feathers, that repel us. I can’t keep quiet any more, says SIMON MILLS

My girlfriend, fully dressed and ready to go out, turns away from her full-length mirror and asks me the eternally dreaded question: ‘How do I look?’

She is a rare beauty who is preternaturally fashionable, clairvoyantly attuned to trends, immaculately stylish and a keen September shopper. And yet today she has elected to wear an outfit that seems, to my male gaze at least, baffling in both its proportion and colourway.

Mannish, barrel-legged jeans that stop mid-calf with four-inch turn-ups; heavy, black, block-heeled, crepe-soled, glam-rockish zippered boots; a fluffy, oversized sleeveless angora jumper in a care-home teal tone, over a white, pie-crust collar

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